i dont see what anyone can see in anyone else, but you

so today i have no friends. and i have to move all of my stuff. and i have no where to go, cause i dont want to pay bus fare, and i have walked everywhere already, and its no fun shopping on jaffo st if i cant buy anything, so i dont want to do that either.

last night i slept over at my ukranian friends house. he's an oleh haddash (new immigrant) and left the ulpan early to move to jerusalem where he got a job. so i hadnt seen him in a while, and it was really nice to see him again. we stayed up really late talking (or attempting to talk, our only common language is hebrew, and neither of us are super at it, but he is better cause he doesnt know english so it has to be), and he left his appartment at 530 to go to work! luckily, his roomate was there until about 8. she is really nice and also ukranian. i left at 7 to go back to my hostel, and went back to sleep.

at about 930 i woke up, and went to the old city to go see the church of the holy seplecure (i think thats what its called) i think its where jesus was reborn. it was pretty cool, except, it was sooooo crowded with tourists (myself included) that it didnt feel so special or holy. you know when you walk into some place sacred, whether its sacred to you or to someone else, you can feel the importance. it has a sort of reverence, and commands respect. but it was sooo crowded with people taking pictures and yelling and and stuff, that it couldnt command respect from these people so it lost all its...meaning i guess. its quite similar at the cotel. i mean, a lot of people go there to pray, but there are so many people who go to the wall, put their hand on in, turn and smile for the camera and walk away, that it takes away from the holiness of it. its quite a shame.

i walked around the shook for a bit, and then ben yehuda and the surrounding roads, but i didnt want to stray too far because at 230 i had to meet chris to give back his phone (which i did just a few minutes ago) and now am completely cell phoneless. but dont worry, i did get a calling card when i ran out of minutes, mostly to call tuvia if i get lost cause im now taking 2 buses and a taxi to his house rather than him picking me up.

and that brings me back to now. with nothing to do until around 4 is when i struggle to the bus station, and start my journey to tel aviv, the last israeli city i will see until summer.

ani lo yodat ma lasot akshav. ani margisha mamash lo normali. ktzat atzuv, ktzat smicha, aayifa.... ma lasot?